Our relationship status does not define us; however, for many singles, this is the driving force behind dating and meeting people. But is marriage and commitment really what everyone wants?
Everyone comes into dating with different goals, but the majority of online daters do not land in long-term relationships. A Pew Research survey in 2020 showed that 30% of U.S. adults use online dating, but only 12% have found a committed relationship or have gotten married as a result.
This statistic begs the question, “what do single people want?” According to the latest dating trends, the answer is oystering and untyping.
What is Oystering?
The UK-based dating app Badoo coined the term oystering to describe what all singles should be doing as they get back into dating, specifically after a breakup. Oystering means seeing the world as your oyster and doing whatever you want.
The idea is to help anyone going through a breakup to let go of what happened and move forward freely. The concept also applies to anyone who hasn’t been in the dating pool for some time or has been on a dating hiatus.
How does one apply the concept of oystering? In any way you like.
Want to have a hot girl summer? Do it.
Want to go crazy on a lot of dates and meet a bunch of people to make up for lost time? Go for it.
Want to focus on finding another committed relationship? Put yourself out there.
Want to make the most of being single and travel the world unencumbered? The world is your oyster.
Oystering allows you the space and time to figure out who you are, what you want, and regain your sense of self.
A 2022 survey by Badoo revealed that over three-quarters of singles would like to date outside their usual type. This fresh new trend has been coined “untyping”.
Badoo’s global dating expert, Sophie Mann, states that the best way to do this is to “reflect on what has gone wrong with your ‘usual’ type. If your usual type is someone who’s into partying, but you’ve not received enough quality time from them, look for someone a little more introverted or laid back.”
Once you understand why it didn’t work out with someone, you can focus on shifting gears and looking for something different. While stepping out of your comfort zone can be scary, it can be the very thing that brings unique people and perspectives into your life.
So, What Do These Trends Mean?
These trends are telling us that it’s essential to define what we’re looking for so that we don’t lead anyone on or waste time on fruitless dates.
Based on the Singles in America study results that Match.com performs each year, singles are coming out of the pandemic with a better sense of self. Around 70% of millennials improved their finances and straightened out their priorities last year, leading to a higher desire to date someone who is equally emotionally mature. More than half support social movements and expect their partner to do the same, and the majority prefer to wait before becoming intimate.
Ultimately, knowing what makes you happy is a very personal decision. Dating doesn’t have to end in a relationship or marriage. The end goal can be to have fun, engage in self-discovery, and come away with an abundance of experiences.
According to Badoo, what anyone should want out of dating is oystering – pursuing the idea of independence and free will to spend your time as you see fit. After essentially losing two years to the pandemic, it’s time to take life by the horns and make the most of every opportunity you encounter.
Make the Most of Dating This Season
Sophie Mann states, “We’ve seen many people getting back into dating, and we predict this new trend of seizing the ‘dating’ day will shine through as many singletons are feeling confident to go out there and get what they want.”
Whether you’re coming out of a relationship or warming up after a dating hiatus, use this time to reflect and grow. Learn from past mistakes, understand what drives you, and consider where you want to go next. Push your comfort zone and give someone new a chance.
After the stress of the last two years, it’s time to get back out there and live life as we’re meant to: the fullest.
Featured image courtesy of unsplash