10 Pearls of Wisdom: What a Healthy, Non-Abusive Relationship Looks Like

Moving on from a toxic relationship can be challenging and often requires unlearning toxic patterns and behaviors. However, recently on a platform, several individuals shared insights on what it is like to be in a healthy relationship and how they experienced greater freedom, trust, and respect.

1. Importance of a Healthy Relationship: Safe Opinions

A user emphasized the importance of a healthy, non-abusive relationship; one can express their opinions without fear of being insulted or dismissed. They can voice their concerns and discontent without worrying about jeopardizing their relationship. For those who have experienced tumultuous relationships, this type of stability can be a welcome change of pace.

2. Peaceful Happiness in a Healthy Relationship

Being in a healthy, non-abusive relationship can bring a sense of peacefulness and contentment. It may feel uneventful in a good way, like spending time with a close friend, but for life.

This type of relationship is peaceful and secure, providing a sense of laziness that can lead to happiness. It feels like hanging out with a best friend, but for life. Even when disagreements and arguments arise, the individual doesn’t feel the urge to end the relationship and still feels loved all the time.

3. Communication & Interest in Preventing Abuse

Sharing her experience of a relationship that started well but ended violently after 15 years, one person noted how communication and interest in each other matter. Despite feeling like everything was fine, her partner never expressed himself or showed much interest in their children. One night, he attacked her when she insisted on answers about her visa.

4. Lack of Communication in Long-Term Relationships

After spending decades together in a close relationship, one user shared, they may realize they don’t know the person they’ve been sleeping with. This feeling could come from the relationship’s lack of communication or effort.

5. Respectful Disagreements in a Healthy Relationship

According to one user, a healthy, non-abusive relationship means having disagreements and opposing opinions without resorting to raised voices or insults. The user shared that they have been with their fiancé for 3.5 years, and although they don’t always agree on everything, they can respectfully discuss uncomfortable topics.

6. Power of Vulnerability in a Relationship

For some, the best part of a stable and healthy relationship is being vulnerable without worrying that their partner would use it against them. They feel secure and comfortable with their partner, knowing they can share their deepest fears and feelings without being judged or criticized.

7. Overcoming Scars of a Toxic Relationship

Someone in the thread shared their experience of being in a toxic relationship for over a decade, leaving them with psychological scars. The commenter had to always walk on eggshells and learn to hide their true self to avoid fights. This behavior continued even when they entered a healthy relationship with their fiancé.

The user talked very little, got overly defensive, and mentally prepared for a fight whenever she felt accused of something. It has been four years since they ended the toxic relationship, and the user is still discovering who they are.

8. Unlearning Toxic Patterns in a Relationship

While being in a healthy, non-abusive relationship is comforting and safe, it can be difficult for those from a toxic relationship to unlearn their old ways. The user has been in a relationship for ten years without fighting. Although they have disagreements, they communicate and never yell or get in each other’s faces.

9. Transitioning to a Healthy Relationship: Challenges

Transitioning from a toxic relationship to a healthy one can be frightening, as per one user. The person recalled a story they heard that toxic relationships are easy while healthy ones are not, resonating with them because it was true for them. They believed that a healthy relationship requires trust, honesty, and vulnerability, which can be daunting when accustomed to non-healthy patterns and behaviors.

10. The Beauty of a Healthy Relationship: Freedom & Respect

According to one user, healthy relationships look like a daily life that feels free. They stated that it’s not about the big, romantic gestures but the day-to-day living. The user mentioned the importance of sharing responsibilities and chores, laughing and joking on an equal plane, talking about past experiences without them being used against you, and respecting each other’s boundaries.

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